from darkness to light by Asmaa Nada chapters 1, 2, 3, 4,5,6

from darkness to light

from darkness to light by Asmaa Nada
chapters 1, 2, 3, 4,5,6

chapter 1

She was a young girl, like any other, dreaming of a fairytale life. She yearned for a loving husband who would be her rock and her refuge. But destiny had other plans. She faced betrayal, a pain that cut deep into her soul. While some might have given up, she chose to fight back. She rose from the ashes, stronger and more determined than ever.

Some may criticize her actions, claiming that she went too far. They argue that in a society that values women and upholds the teachings of compassion, revenge is not the answer. However, others believe that she was justified in her actions. They argue that men who abuse their power and treat women with disrespect deserve to face consequences.

Join us as we hear her story in her own words. She will share the details of her ordeal and explain why she made the choices she did. Her story is a powerful reminder of the resilience of the human spirit and the importance of standing up for oneself."

The sounds of excitement filled the ordinary Turkish home, a place usually synonymous with tranquility and familial warmth. Despite the absence of a father figure, the mother, Nursin, had managed to create a loving and supportive environment. Her strength, forged in the fires of personal adversity, had allowed her to not only protect her children but also rebuild her own life.

‘Hurry up, hurry up!’ Nursin urged. ‘The program’s about to start.’

Hesham, her son, handed her a bowl of popcorn. ‘Have this. And Selina, did you put Grandma to bed?’

‘I tried,’ Selina replied, ‘but she wants to watch and listen to Grandma on TV.’

Hesham sighed. ‘Well, I can’t argue with that.’ Turning to Nursin, he asked, ‘Where’s your husband and son?’

‘They’ll be here any minute,’ Nursin replied, a hint of worry in her voice. ‘I don’t know why they’re so late.’

‘Dad and Fahad are here!’ Nursin’s daughter-in-law, Nefin, announced.

‘Finally!’ Nursin exclaimed. ‘But where’s your son?’

‘I’m here, Auntie,’ Adam, Nursin’s nephew, replied. ‘I finished work early so I could watch Grandma on TV.’

Hesham smiled. ‘Alright, everyone, take your seats. The program’s starting.’"

A hush fell over the room as everyone turned their gaze to the television screen. The opening music faded, and the camera focused on the host, who began with a warm greeting.

‘Good evening, everyone. Welcome back to our show. Today, we have a very special guest who has achieved remarkable success in a short period. A woman who defied all odds, immigrating to a new country and leaving behind a past filled with setbacks. In just a few years, she has made a name for herself, saving countless lives and earning the hearts of countless more. Not only that, but she has also managed to educate her children in a foreign language and has encouraged them to excel in their chosen fields. Without further ado, let’s welcome our guest, the renowned heart surgeon, Dr. Salma Abdel Kader.’

‘Thank you for that wonderful introduction,’ Dr. Salma replied.

‘It’s well-deserved,’ the host said. ‘Your many admirers want to know more about you. And young women, in particular, look up to you as an inspiration.’

‘Thank you,’ Dr. Salma replied. ‘I believe everyone, men and women alike, should never let life’s challenges defeat them. Adversity doesn’t break those who learn from it. When we fall, we shouldn’t wait for someone to pick us up. We must find the strength to rise on our own. After all, only we can dry our own tears.’"

Host: You're absolutely right. We shouldn't let sadness defeat us. Tell us, how long have you been living in Turkey?

Dr. Salma: Next month will mark my 36th year here.

Host: Oh wow, only 36 years! And in that time, you've managed to become one of the most renowned heart surgeons, with your own private clinic in addition to working in Cairo’s hospitals. I’ve heard that before coming to Turkey, you were a simple doctor. You came here to further your studies.

Dr. Salma smiled, reminiscing about leaving Egypt with limited work experience and how she had planned to balance advanced studies with work to gain experience, all while encouraging her children to forget the past and focus on their education. Yes, she had come to Turkey with nothing, fleeing the pain of heartbreak, and now she was one of Turkey’s most famous doctors. She was startled out of her reverie by the host's voice.

Host: And that's not all. You've also raised successful children. Your daughter is a top journalist with her own publishing house, married with two children. And your son is a skilled general surgeon with three children, the eldest of whom is now in university. Is that correct?

Dr. Salma: Yes, and I am very proud of what they have achieved. It wasn’t my doing, of course. All credit goes to God. I simply supported and guided them, and they chose their own paths.

Host: Thank you for taking the time to speak with us.

Dr. Salma: Thank you for having me."

As the closing music played, signaling the end of the program, the host invited viewers to join them next time for another inspiring story. Applause erupted in Dr. Salma's home as her grandchildren cheered, their excitement mingled with Nursin's tears and Hesham's quiet, reassuring smile. He whispered to his sister, 'She deserves all the happiness.'

Nursin wiped away her tears. 'Yes, she's suffered a lot to get here.'

'Let's get ready to celebrate her when she comes home,' Selina suggested.

They all jumped up, eager to decorate and prepare snacks. They contacted friends and family, inviting them to the surprise party. Soon, the house was filled with people, and they turned off the lights to create a surprise.

The drive from the studio to her home took two and a half hours, giving her family and friends plenty of time to prepare. When she arrived, she noticed the house was dark and assumed her children couldn't make it home. Her son had told her he had work that night, and his wife and children were staying with her family. Her daughter, since getting married, had moved to a nearby neighborhood. She smiled at herself in the mirror and stepped out of the car, locking it behind her. As she walked towards the house, she murmured to herself, 'I wish you could be here with me today, but that's life.'

She walked slowly, each step heavy. She knew that once she was alone, her mind would wander back to the past. The questions would start to gnaw at her: Had she done the right thing? Was she being unfair? Or had they deserved what she had done?

chapter 2

She reached out and turned the doorknob, then took a couple of steps forward and tried to switch on the light, but it didn't work. She looked out the window and saw that all the lights were on, so there wasn't a power outage. She tried pressing the switch again, but still nothing. She realized something was definitely wrong.

She headed towards the kitchen to light some candles, but suddenly the lights came on and everyone started shouting:

"Happy birthday, my beautiful mother, friend, and the most wonderful grandmother!"

She was overwhelmed by the surprise. It completely wiped away the sadness that had been filling her heart. Her grandchildren came running to hug and kiss her hands, and she returned their affection. Hesham embraced her and said,

"Did you really think we would let a day like this pass without being here with you?"

Norsin shouted, pushing Hesham away slightly, 'Come on, that's enough. I love you, Mom. You deserve the best in life.'

'My dear children, you are the greatest honor I've ever received,' she replied."

After everyone had finished congratulating her and they had chatted for two hours, all the friends and neighbors left, leaving the small family to enjoy the warmth of their victory over life.

After Norsin, her children, and her husband went up to the bedrooms in her mother's house, and Hesham and his wife and children followed, Salma went to her room on the second floor feeling happy and proud of these little ones who now filled her life. After she prepared for bed, as she had been accustomed to for years, she went to the small desk in one corner of the room and took out a sky-blue notebook. She sat down and began to record the events that had happened that morning until she returned home.

She took the notebook and sat on the bed, leaning back against the pillow as she flipped through the pages. She decided to read what she had written, perhaps her mind would calm down and be reassured that she had done the right thing.

She began to gaze at these lines that she had written with her own hand one day, and then she began to read: 'No one knows the pain of a broken heart except the one who has broken their own heart without mercy. Many men forget the woman who was their support in life and their shelter from the harshness of life. When their pockets are filled with money, they begin searching for a new bride, forgetting that they are destroying one home to build another without considering whether they really need a second marriage or not. Is the woman who has been with him for years and endured hardships with him without complaining deserving of him bringing another into her life? She has wasted years of her life with him; she has neglected herself to build her life with him. He simply repeats, "I have the right to polygamy, and if you want a divorce, leave or stay with your children and I will take care of the expenses," and society pressures her with empty phrases and harsh conditions: "If you get divorced, who will support you? Who will look at you as a woman with rights? You will simply become easy prey for those seeking temporary pleasure or you will become homeless without a family or a companion to help you with the loneliness of death," or "Stay with your children, raise them, and be content with what you have." So the choice is either to be divorced and easy prey or a piece of furniture with no importance.

That was my situation, but I chose something else. Yes, he acted selfishly and sought only his own happiness and pleasure. He didn't think about me or our children. So why shouldn't I do the same? Why shouldn't I think only of myself? Yes, I will take revenge. I will soothe my heart and leave my children their inheritance from their father. I don't want anything from him, but no one else will take him either. I pretended to agree to him marrying another woman on the condition that he live with me for one month and eat three meals with me every day for the last time. The children would stay with their mother during this month, and at the end of the month, he had to take his children with him to his other wife or bring her to live with him at home. I would get a divorce and travel, and he would be responsible for them. In exchange for this last month together, I would sign a waiver of all my rights from him and the children as well. And indeed, he agreed to everything I said and took a month's leave from work. He took the children to his mother's, and I prepared the best food he liked for every meal and wore the most beautiful clothes to go out and sat in front of him, eating in the most elegant ways I had learned in university. After every meal, I would go to the children's room and lock the apartment door with a key and then the room door.

A week passed like this. He would talk as usual about work, and I would listen to him and even give him some advice on treating patients, as I had been a medical doctor once. Sadly, I had left my work to take care of my home and raise the children and bear the burdens of the house. And this was my reward when he became wealthy and had a lot of money. The first thing he did was to seek pleasure with a girl the age of his daughter, or whatever her age was, I didn't ask and I didn't care. All that mattered to him was to find his happiness by destroying another person's home and causing misery. But I return to say that it's not her fault, but the biggest mistake is his. He is the one who desecrated my heart and destroyed my happiness after taking all my life that I had spent for him. Yes, he deserves what I intend to do to him. As for her, we'll see if she can handle him and his children afterward.

Her thoughts were interrupted by his voice, which she hated more than anything. 'Don't change your mind. I'm still your partner. I want you to be my wife.'

'We won't talk about this. You chose what you call your legal right, and I also chose my legal right.

So why did you ask for this cursed month?" she asked.

"I gave you my life and my youth. Are you begrudging me one month? Consider it our last memory together," he replied.

"Fine, I'll divorce you and you can stay with the children. You don't have anywhere else to go, and I'll take care of your expenses and theirs," he offered.

"Don't worry about me. That's not your concern anyway. As for the children, they're yours. I'll talk to them online, and if you don't allow that, it's fine. One day they'll look for me. If they don't, then there's God."

"I won't deprive you of your children. You're the one who will leave them."

"Leave them with their father. I'm not a working woman and I won't be able to support them. They need you more."

"I told you not to worry about money. I'll take care of all of you."

"No, keep your money for yourself. You might need it more to spend on your new bride."

She got up and left him sitting at the table, going into the kitchen as she said, "I'll make some mango juice.

After going into the kitchen and adding the mango pieces to the blender, she paused, her mind racing. She thought about all the years she had devoted to him and their family, only to be betrayed. A bitter smile crept across her face as she poured herself a glass of juice. Turning to him, she said,

"Why did you ask for this month?"

He was puzzled. "What do you mean?"

"You've given me a lifetime of pain. How can you ask for more?" she replied bitterly. "You've taken my youth and my dreams. And now you expect me to simply accept this?"

He tried to soothe her, "I've never neglected your needs. I swear."

"Actions speak louder than words," she retorted. "You've chosen another woman over me. How can I forgive that?"

He sighed. "I know I've made a mistake. But please understand, my heart was drawn to her."

She laughed coldly. "You could have chosen differently. But you didn't. And for that, I'll never forgive you. I'll pray every day that you'll pay for what you've done."

Without waiting for his reply, she rose and went to her room, as she did every night. She closed the door behind her and sat on her bed, listening to his conversation with that other snake who had allowed herself to build her house on the ruins of another. But why blame her? The fault lies with my husband; he is the one who chose her."

chapter 3

The next morning, I slipped into the kitchen and began to prepare breakfast. Over the years, I've learned his favorite things, like scrambled eggs with pastrami. This time, I added some sausage and a blend of ground grains known to boost female hormones. I also boiled a couple of eggs, laid out various cheeses, jams, and tahini. For years, I've dedicated myself to learning everything he loves to eat, to prepare it for him with love. How foolish I was to believe the saying that 'the way to a man's heart is through his stomach.' I'd always overlooked the stories of my friends who were betrayed by the men they loved.

Once, I read these words: 'This is how a woman dies: when the smile fades from her face, when she no longer clings to someone's hand, when she no longer waits for an embrace, and when a sarcastic smile crosses her face at the mention of love.' By Rima Adnan.

At the time, I thought to myself, 'He couldn't do that to me.' How naive I was to have devoted my life to trusting him, to the point of forgetting my own dreams and goals. I gave up my beloved career to please him. Now, my genuine smile has vanished, replaced by a sarcastic smirk whenever I read about love or remember my love for him.

I finished preparing breakfast and placed it on the table on the balcony. Then, I went into our former bedroom and called out to him to wake him up.

‘Hey, stranger, come on, get up. I’ve made your favorite breakfast.’

‘Stranger? Am I a stranger to you?’

‘Yes, you’ve become a stranger I don’t recognize. The man I knew died when his heart turned to another.’

‘There is no god but God. So why are you insisting on this cursed month?’

‘Don’t be angry. It’s only been two weeks, and there are still two more to go.’

‘I want to know your purpose in all of this if you’re so determined to get a divorce.’

‘I told you, I want to keep the last memory between us for the rest of my life.’

‘Won’t you reconsider your decision?’

‘I won’t change my mind even if you were to end your marriage to her. What’s broken can’t be fixed.’"

I won't change my decision. I won't do anything haram, and I will marry according to the Sunnah of Allah and His Messenger.

"Fine, do as you please. By the way, I'm going to travel abroad. I've already booked a flight to Turkey in three weeks. My master's degree application has been approved.

"When did you apply for graduate studies there without my knowledge? You know I was completely against you continuing your studies here in Egypt. You don't need it."

I looked at him with a sarcastic smile on my lips and a look of reproach and blame in my eyes. Then I replied, "It's none of your business, especially after your decision to marry another. Besides, my heart has turned to knowledge, and that's not haram."

"And if I say I won't divorce you?"

"I'll divorce you, and the law is on my side. Don't forget or I might even have you imprisoned. Have you forgotten that you gave me a promissory note for a million pounds?"

"I didn't do that."

I laughed and told him, "You did when you asked my father for it in the past and he took a promissory note from you in my name until our marriage."

"Yes, and he gave it back to me after the wedding."

"Yes, it was in the safe when I was organizing it, and I took it. I'll return it to you after the divorce. Also, I've taken the money that was in the safe and transferred the money that was in my name to a bank account in Turkey. You can consider it compensation for the years I gave up my dreams, goals, and career for you."

"You think you can force me not to marry and that I'll stay here with you?"

"I told you I've already booked a flight. And I've been accepted for both study and work. So how do you think I want you to stay with me? Don't worry, it's only two weeks. You'll see a different side of me in those weeks, a side you've never seen before."

"Fine, congratulations on the money you transferred. And this house, I remember I wrote it in your name."

"No, dear, this house is in the name of our eldest son, but you wrote the villa in the compound in my name. And since I won't be staying in Egypt, I've sold it and transferred the amount to Turkey as well. There's something else I did but I can't remember right now. I'll tell you when I remember. I've done a lot of things you'll learn about in time."

"It doesn't matter. You've taken a cup of water from the sea, but that won't stop me from marrying whoever I want. And to assure you that I don't care what you've done, we'll finish these weeks together and I'll divorce you of my own free will. You won't need to go to court, and I won't stand in front of my children in the future as I made their mother go to court."

"Good for you, but think about what you'll tell your daughter's husband in the future when he marries another woman. I think you should prepare your daughter to accept another wife or even be the second wife herself. And you should make her believe that her happiness at the expense of another's pain is normal. Anyway, she's with you, teach her whatever you want."

"I got up and left him on the balcony and went into the kitchen to prepare a cup of tea with some cake. That was our usual routine after breakfast. And of course, I didn't forget to mix a sexual enhancer pill into the cake mix, which I wouldn't eat. And of course, he knows I don't eat cake in general and he doesn't care what I eat or drink.

I returned to him with a tray of tea and cake. He was sitting, flipping through the morning newspaper, muttering:

'The same news, nothing new. This country has become so boring.'

I replied: 'That's how a woman's life is, without work, confined to the house, between housework, raising children, and serving her husband. A life like the newspaper, the same boring routine every day. The difference is that women do it with love, but you read the newspaper out of habit.'

'A woman's responsibility is to clean the house and take care of the children.'

'No, dear. Women are the equals of men and have the same rights and duties in worship. As for marriage, it's a partnership between both parties in everything. If women go out to work, the husband should share household responsibilities, just as she pays half the household expenses. But when she stays at home and he works, she should, as a favor to him, consider his tiredness from work and take responsibility for the house. As for raising children, it's the responsibility of both husband and wife, which is why marriage is called a partnership.'

'I'm going to get up before you tell me to wash the dishes. You've lost your mind.'

'Don't worry, I'll leave that to your new wife.

He glared at me, then disappeared into the room. After a short while, he called my name, thinking I would go to him. But he was surprised when I passed by the room door, looked at him, and said:

"I'm going to take a short nap. If you need anything, do it yourself."

Then I entered the children's room and closed the door from the inside while I listened to the sound of things breaking. After the sound stopped, I shouted from behind the door:

"You have to clean up what you've done or leave it for your future wife."

"I'll marry her today and bring her to live here with me."

"Do that and lose what's left of your money and property."

"What do you mean?"

"Have you forgotten that at the beginning of our marriage, you signed some papers waiving all your property if you married another woman without my consent?"

"Damn it, I didn't own anything back then, and I did it as a joke."

"But I kept it at first to brag to my friends about how happy I was to keep this paper."

"You're a fool, indeed. A fool to trust his wife to this extent."

In a low voice: "Rather, a fool who breaks his wife's trust." Then I raised my voice: "Yes, you're right, I was foolish to trust your love for me and give up my dreams and goals to stay with you and support you so you could rise and succeed."

What I have is the result of my hard work, and you have no credit in it. Your constant repetition about sacrificing your dreams, I never forced you to do this, but it was your responsibilities at home and towards our children. I never was, and never will be, willing to take care of the children so you could continue your studies."

Then I heard the door of his room slam shut, and silence prevailed for a long time. I went to the kitchen to prepare lunch. The living room was as destroyed as he had left it, and he was sitting on the balcony. I didn't address him, I prepared the food and continued with what I intended, for what he said and did only increased my determination for revenge. After I finished preparing the food and placed it on the balcony table, I sat down and didn't speak, but began to eat under his angry gaze.

"After you finish eating, clean the living room."

"I won't, and you have to clean it while I'm in the kitchen washing the dishes."

"Do you want me to hit you after all these years between us?"

I smiled at him and said, "Do it if you want, but you have to remember well that I don't give up my rights."

"What are you going to do? Tell me."

"Just do it and you'll see."

He was silent for a moment, then began to finish his food, eating with anger filling his eyes and movements. After we finished and I carried the dishes to the kitchen, he followed me shouting:

"Go and clean the living room."

When I turned around, he was holding a belt in his hand. Before I knew it, I pulled out the knife I had hidden in my clothes and quickly slashed his arm. It was a surprise to him, and to me as well. I shouted:

'This will give you a strong reason to hit me.'

'Are you crazy? You slashed my arm with a knife?'

'It's just a superficial cut, doctor. This is just to threaten you, but if you even think of daring to raise that belt towards me again, be sure I will do more than just cut you. And not just you, but also my own body. Then forget about your good reputation among people, and the destroyed furniture will be proof that you're the culprit.'

With a confident smile, he said, 'Your fingerprints are on the knife.'

I laughed and replied, 'I don't have any fingerprints anywhere. All the prints here are yours. Don't you see that I always wear medical gloves? And this knife has your fingerprints on it since yesterday when you cut the apple with it.'

'Really, do you intend to send me to prison so I won't marry another?'

'If I wanted to do that, why would I wait a whole month? I just wanted some time as a last memory between us. Why ruin it? Can't you wait two weeks and then we'll separate without a fight?'

'But I don't want to separate. Why don't you stay with me and I'll divide my time between you and I won't be unfair to you.'

'You've already been unfair to me by considering another. I've never failed in my duties towards you. You were unfair to me by breaking my trust in you. You were unfair to me when you preferred your new marriage to destroying what was between us. And I'll never forgive you, even if you cancel your marriage to another.'

'I haven't wronged you, I've only exercised my legal right. The law allows me to marry more than one wife.

And the law allows me to divorce, and I'm exercising this right.'"

chapter 4

Five days passed, and our lives became more routine. We didn't argue or hurt each other with words. During these days, I received the passport that my brother had sent me, who, by the way, knows nothing about the divorce plan. He thinks we're spending a month without our children to renew our life together, or that's what I told my family, I mean my brothers. Each of them is busy with his own life with his wife and children. Even our phone calls after my parents' death have become only for necessities. Today, there are nine days left of the month, and he has only now noticed the changes in his body. His hair has grown longer and he has gained weight. This is due to sitting at home for a long time, which he is not used to. When I heard him justify the changes in his body, I would hide my smile and confirm what he said. I would even tell him that before his new marriage, he should go to the gym and follow a diet, and he would return to his previous slimness.

"Can't I go to the gym in these ten days?"

"No, we agreed to stay inside the apartment and neither of us would go out. Besides, didn't I break the boredom by teaching you some cooking skills to impress your new wife?"

"Yes, and this confuses me. On the one hand, you want a divorce and reject my second marriage, and on the other hand, you're thinking about how to be happy with her. I really don't understand you."

"Just because I don't want you anymore doesn't mean I hate your happiness."

And I continued in my mind: "I just wish I could see your face on the first day of your marriage or hear your mother's comments saying that someone has bewitched you." Then I told him,

"Shall I make you that juice and we can talk to the kids online?"

"Yes, make that amazing cocktail you made me the day before yesterday.

I got up and nodded in agreement. Then I went into the kitchen and took out various fruits from the refrigerator, along with a small box containing the powdered grains I had ground to save time dissolving them. I made the juice, prepared a glass for myself, and turned on the blender again. I added a small spoon of the powder, then poured the juice into a bottle and took an empty glass for him and some cake that he had made the day before. I smiled, remembering that I had made him put the powder in with his own hands, telling him it was a cake enhancer. Honestly, I tried more than once to stop my revenge and just leave, but hearing him talk to her on the phone every night in his room increased my determination for revenge. It wasn't jealousy, but rather a sense of bitterness for the years I wasted, sacrificing my dreams to please him. I had left my passion for science to take care of his successes and push him forward. How many tears I shed during the past twenty days when I remembered staying up late at night to prepare the materials for his master's thesis, and I convinced myself that his success was my success. How naive I was.

I went, carrying the tray with the cups and cake in one hand and the juice bottle in the other. For the first time in our lives, he got up and took the tray from me so we could sit close to the camera and not show our parents or children that there was a disagreement at all. He deliberately put his hand behind my back and kissed me every now and then while talking to his mother. I didn't mind, in fact, I returned his actions to show that I hadn't changed and that she wouldn't suspect anything. After the conversation ended and he hung up the phone, I would forcefully remove his hand and look at him with hatred. Sometimes I would shout at him, "You're a good liar, and you've made me a good liar too. I really hate you." Then I would leave him and go to my room, throw myself on the bed, and continue my sobbing and crying over what I had become. His wound and my hatred for him had robbed me of my pure heart. Deep in my mind, I realized that I had changed, yes, I had changed for the worse. It wasn't my fault what I was doing, but his fault. I contacted one of my friends that night and I cried hysterically, telling her about my feelings that had turned from love to pure hatred, and how I felt pain in my heart that was tearing me apart and making me want to kill him a thousand times. Her answer was as expected, she told me I should end my sitting with him, stay away, and see a psychologist because I was killing myself this way.

On the morning of the eighth day before the end of the month, yes, the countdown had begun when I started doubling the dose I was giving him. I sat down and took my pen and started writing some sentences in my diary as I used to.

Let silence guide us to the end of the road... to the abyss we don't hope for. My mind faltered before I even wrote the first word. My compass was lost in the mirage of beautiful dreams. My strength abandoned me in the darkness of long streets. Now we have nothing but to walk and stumble; there's no alternative to taking the final journey.

What's left of me? A disabled mind, a postponed hope, a cold life, wandering thoughts, and many illusions, sins, and the scent of loved ones' graves. What remains with me? Withered roses, naive stories, a nation begging for reassurance, and an extinguished flame of passion. A woman disfigured by the fires of memory and the whip of lies.

In my bag are many gifts and presents: advice from the miserable and prayers of the elderly, empty embraces devoid of feelings, a morning alarm for breakfast and breakdown, a broken pen, a dictator's hat, and the remains of a city destroyed by the volcano of injustice. Faded papers to write the conclusion of a novel without a narrative or events.

Let silence kill us, hang us on the gallows of a better tomorrow and awaited happiness. How beautiful death is in autumn, like falling leaves, scattering like joyful hopes, carried away by the wind... to the unknown.

Words of the professor #Ahmed_Said_AbdElghaffar"

I closed my diary and decided to run away. I wouldn't complete this revenge. It no longer deserved to burn my soul with anger. It's enough now. I'm the one who's lost, and the fire is consuming me, while he, as always, doesn't see how much he's hurt me. I left my room and went to his room, but I didn't find him. I started looking for him inside the house but found no trace. I thought he was tired of staying at home and went out, so I went to take the blankets out of his room to the sun. But before entering the balcony of the room, I heard mumbling. I dropped what was in my hand to the ground and approached to see who he was talking to. And it was a surprise.

Before I tell you what I saw, let me tell you something. I don't have any close friends except for one who grew up with me and is also my cousin. She's the same age as me but she didn't get married because she prefers independence and building herself, or so she says. She traveled to America after high school to complete her education abroad. And news spread in the family that she had become a brilliant heart surgeon. In fact, upon her return to Egypt, she established a private hospital and, surprisingly, asked me to work in her hospital three months ago. But my dear husband had completely rejected this offer, arguing that my work would affect my children's upbringing. Out of my love and trust in him, I rejected my cousin's offer. But two weeks after that, she came to visit me and told me that my husband was in a relationship with another woman and that she had seen them together in a restaurant and heard him promise her marriage. When I confronted my husband, he didn't deny it.

As I approached the balcony, I heard the murmuring more clearly. I reached out and slowly pulled back the curtain. There he was, standing and talking to our neighbor on the adjacent balcony. Yes, from my position, I couldn't see her, but I could clearly distinguish her voice. And to my shock, the voice belonged to my cousin. This is what I heard from their conversation:

"My love, don't be angry. There are only a few days left, and as I promised you, I haven't touched her. I even told you that she sleeps in the children's room."

"Yes, you told me that, but you're together all the time, and I'm afraid your heart will lean towards her and you'll forget me. And I'm the one who left America to come and live here next to you."

"How can my heart lean towards her when you are the heart itself? Don't you remember that I married her primarily to annoy you? Yes, I admit it was a mistake I made, that I loved to annoy you for rejecting me, so I married your dearest friend. But my heart has never forgotten your love."

"Listen to me, you have to convince her to take your children because I don't have time to take care of them. And of course, I won't quit my job, I'm not as stupid as she is."

"And if she doesn't take them, no problem, they will be in my mother's care."

I stepped away from the balcony because I couldn't bear to listen anymore. I couldn't stop my tears from flowing as I remembered my cousin's call before my marriage, when she warned me about marrying him. She said, "Listen carefully, he is a selfish and treacherous person who is incapable of love. Run away from this marriage... You're stupid, one day you will prove that he's not even worth thinking about." I went to my room, and her old words echoed in my ears. How she had warned me about him in the past, and now she comes to take him from me and hurt me like this. Is it possible that she was right about him all along? Could it be that all these years I was this stupid, or is she just returning what he loved her for? But it doesn't matter, he deserves my revenge, and as for her, she'll have her time. I wiped away my tears and cleaned my face, then put a smile back on my face. I left the room and went to the kitchen and started preparing breakfast. I even made all the dishes he loved and didn't put any pills in them this time. Then I put them in food containers and went to him. I found him sitting at the dining table and said to him...

"Why don't we go to the park today and have breakfast there for a change?"

"Great idea! Let me just change my clothes."

"Me too."

Half an hour later, we left the house and headed to the park. I had called my mother-in-law and asked her to come to the park and bring the children with her. Then, while I was on the way with him, I called a food place and ordered food for lunch for when my mother-in-law arrived. They did come, and we had a really fun time together. I took our children home with me after I offered to do so.

"We have eight days left. What do you think? After that, I'll start preparing to travel. Can you give me the divorce papers? The children can stay with you for these eight days and then the waiting period. After that, I'll travel and leave them with you."

"You're still insisting on leaving?"

Our 13-year-old daughter said, "Mom, why are you leaving us and traveling?"

"I told you, my love, that I'm going to complete my studies there, and when I come back, we'll be together."

Our 20-year-old son said, "Good luck, Mom. Don't worry, I'll take care of my sister during this time."

"Why don't you take her to complete her studies with you? I'll pay for all her expenses."

"Good idea. What do you think, daughter? Do you want to come with me?"

The daughter excitedly replied, "Yes, I'll come?"

"But your husband, you have to deposit two million pounds in your son's account and he will send your daughter whatever expenses she needs, otherwise the girl won't stay with you."

The husband whispered to her, "Don't you trust me? Are you afraid that I won't take care of my daughter?"

"What trust are you talking about? Haven't you destroyed it with your own hands? Don't talk about something you don't have. Put the money in your son's account."

"Why not put it in your account?"

"I don't want it. It's my daughter's right, not mine."

"Haven't you taken more than that?"

"I told you it's my right, and you still owe me something that I haven't taken yet. But rest assured, I will take it."

"How much do you want, and I'll pay you, so you can't say that I took anything that wasn't yours?"

"You'll know for sure before I travel. And now, let's go say goodbye to your mother and go back home."

"We got up and said goodbye to my mother-in-law after seeing her off to her house, then we returned home as a family. My son went into his room and my daughter and I went into her room. He went into his room and locked the door behind him.

"Mom, why are you sleeping here? Your clothes are on my bed."

"Because I want to sleep next to you."

"Are you really going to separate from Dad like Grandma said?"

"Yes, and this is between me and your father. It's none of your business."

"No, it's because of the new bride, the snake, as Grandma said."

"Your grandma said that, and she doesn't like me. Subhan Allah (Glory be to God)."

"No, Grandma loves you very much and she also said that Dad will regret what he's doing because he will lose an angel like you."

"Your grandma said that?"

"Yes, and she told my brother that she loves teasing you and she never imagined that Dad would marry another woman because you're the best thing that ever happened to him and he will lose a lot."

"I think I should apologize to her. I misunderstood her all these years."

"But you haven't done anything wrong to her. Why apologize?"

"Yes, I haven't done anything wrong because she's like a mother to me, and I should have treated her like my mother. But I thought she hated me, and that was a mistake. So I'm going to apologize to her and express my love for her. Come on, let's prepare some popcorn and sit together with your brother to watch a movie."

After the girl and I prepared the popcorn and some types of cake, we went to the living room. My son and husband were watching the news. After we sat with them and my son brought some blankets, I said to them,

"Choose a funny movie for us to watch together."

The husband said, "I agree. We want something funny. You choose, Hisham."

Hisham said, "No, I don't want to. I don't have the right to choose in front of my little sister. Because the house is her kingdom and we are guests in the kingdom. Come on, Norsin, you choose."

Norsin looked at her mother and said, "Let's watch any Ismail Yassin movie. My mom loves him."

Hisham said, "Yes, that's the best. How about Ismail Yassin in the army?"

"Yes, that's very funny. Come on, put the movie on quickly."

Hisham got up from beside me and searched in my movie library. He pulled out a disc and placed it in the DVD player.

We were all laughing loudly, even though we had watched this movie many times before. But who can resist watching these kinds of movies? Our laughter was interrupted when Hisham spoke:

"There's nothing better than the warmth of family."

My husband said, "That's true. Tell your mother to be reasonable and change her mind about traveling and stay with us."

Hisham replied, "If she had found someone to support her here, she wouldn't have traveled abroad."

The husband said, "Higher studies won't benefit her in any way, and her home deserves her efforts more."

Hisham retorted, "How won't it benefit her? It will benefit her in her future career and prove her personality and her right to life."

The husband said, "Women's place is in their homes. They shouldn't tire themselves with work as long as the man can provide for all their needs or is a weak man."

Norsin said, "So, are you a weak man that's why you're going to marry a working woman or will you force her to quit her job and stay at home?"

My husband got up without answering and yelled at me, "You've corrupted the children's minds with your rebellion against my right."

Hisham said, "Why do you consider marrying another woman a right of yours, and her work and education not her right? Why does your new wife agree to work while you forbid my mother from studying and working?"

My husband said, "How dare you talk to me like that?"

Hisham replied, "I haven't said anything wrong. Even if the warmth of the home comes from the family being together, it's you who deprived us of this warmth, not my mother."

My husband left the living room filled with anger and went to his room. I stood up to face my son and said,

"Your way of speaking to your father is impolite. You could have expressed your opinion in a calm and gentle voice, not by attacking your father like that. Besides, when you finish university, you can come to Turkey and stay with me. The only reason I haven't taken you with me is your studies. So focus on finishing them quickly and we'll be together again. As for your father, he has chosen part of his right, as he says, and I have also chosen my right. You are not to blame, and we won't separate from you or your father. Our separation has nothing to do with your relationship with your father. Now go and apologize for the way you spoke, my love."

Hisham said, "I don't want you to separate. He doesn't lack anything to go to another woman."

"He has chosen that, and he alone will bear the consequences. My love, no one likes separation, but that's life. One day is happy and another is sad. But you will always be my son, no matter how far apart we are, and we will be together again someday. Come on, for my sake, go and apologize for the way you spoke to your father."

Hisham kissed my forehead and went towards his father's room. As for me, I took Norsin into my arms to stop her from crying, and we went to her room. After a while, Hisham came and sat with us, saying,

"I'm going to sleep with you in the room here."

He spread some blankets on the floor and put pillows on them, then sat down. We spent the rest of the day, my daughter and I, laughing and talking about what I would do in Turkey and how I would arrange to buy a house there and work in the public hospital in Turkey while studying.

chapter 5

Days passed, and I found solace in the company of my children. I'd started slipping medication into my youngest son's meals, knowing full well he wouldn't share them with his siblings. This was a habit my husband had picked up, a nasty one. He'd always taken more than his fair share of food or drinks, justifying it by claiming he worked harder than the rest of us. The children had grown accustomed to it, despite my repeated attempts to explain why it was wrong. I always had to remind them to tolerate their father because his mother had spoiled him. Yes, his mother was a kind woman, but he was her eldest son among three daughters. She believed in treating him differently, saying he was the man of the house after his father. And after his father passed, this favoritism only intensified. I can't blame her entirely; she was uneducated. But he was different. He was educated, traveled abroad for work, only to return because he couldn't manage on his own. If I were to blame anyone for his bad habits, it would be him.

Over the past six days, I've noticed my husband trying to get our daughter's school records so he could give them to one of his friends who lives in the same city where we're moving in Turkey. He even suggested my son withdraw from university and come with us, but my son refused, saying he wanted to finish his studies in his own country. He said he would stay with his grandmother to avoid disrupting his stepmother's life. He actually called her 'your wife, sir.'

I sat with my son in his room one evening and asked, 'Why do you call your father "sir" instead of "Dad"?'

He replied, 'He asked me to. He said if I called him "Dad," everyone would think he's old, and I couldn't call him by his name because it would be disrespectful. So, I chose "sir."'

My anger flared. He was depriving his son of even the most basic of paternal feelings. I told my son, 'If I hear you call him "sir" one more time, I'll get a gun and shoot myself. I don't care what he wants. He's your father, and you should call him "Dad". Do you understand?'

He replied, 'He'll get angry with me. He once tried to hit me for forgetting and calling him "Dad," but my grandmother stopped him.

I left him in the room and rushed to the living room where my husband was sitting. I heard him telling the girl not to tell anyone she was his daughter. I couldn't stay silent and screamed at him,

'Have you gone mad? Look at yourself in the mirror, see all those wrinkles on your face! How dare you tell your children not to call you 'Dad'? Let me tell you something, you’re as good as dead to them. They don’t have a father. Divorce me now and get out of this house. Forget about them as if you never had children. No, no, we'll be the ones leaving now. I'll send the divorce papers to my brother. And by the way, I've sold this house, and we need to vacate it in two days.'

'What have you done? Listen, I won't divorce you.'

'If you don't, I'll send you to jail today, not tomorrow. You have one day to choose: divorce or jail. And not just for a minor offense, I won't tell you now. Come on, Norsin, get up and change your clothes. And you too, Hesham.'

Norsin asked, 'Where are we going?'

'Don't worry, little one, I have a little surprise for you.'

'I don't understand why you asked them to treat you like their brother instead of their father. All I wanted was to connect with them, not to disown them.'

'Their brother, by having your son call you 'sir'? Who are you fooling? They're not your servants. How could you think that you could erase the feeling of having a father, a protector, from their hearts? Understand that you never loved me. I was just a tool for you to take revenge on your cousin. I can understand that, but I can't understand how you could renounce fatherhood. How could you erase those moments of their lives in a moment, just because she agreed to be in your life? How could you have such a selfish and cruel heart? I really don't know how I ever loved you. How did I not see your true colors all these years? Was it your acting skills or my stupidity and love for you?'

'What are you saying? Who told you about her? Who fed you this nonsense? I didn't know your cousin before we got married. She was just our neighbor.'

'Enough lies, be quiet. Divorce me now or I swear I'll forget you're their father.'

'Fine, you're divorced. That's what you want, isn't it? See, children, she's the one who insists on the divorce. I tried, but she insists.'"

He said what he said, opened the door, and left. I sat there, unable to believe how I had been deceived for all these years. I cried, not because he had divorced me, but because of the life I had wasted on a lie that had never been true. My daughter sat beside me and whispered,

"That bad woman made my father change his mind. I don't know why he's turned away from us like this."

"No, he hasn't turned away from you. It's just a temporary phase. He'll come back to you. He knows no one will love him like you do."

Norsin said, "And you're my mom."

"I love you, and I always will, no matter what. Come on, we need to pack your things because we're moving out until it's time to travel."

Hesham asked, "And what about me, Mom? Can I go back to the university dorm? But Dad won't pay for it. He said that if I tell you anything, he'll stop my allowance and any money for university."

"Don't worry, I'll take care of everything. I have enough for all of us."

Hesham asked, "Where did you get the money? Are you working?"

"Your father put money in the bank in my name to avoid taxes. It's rightfully yours now."

Hesham smiled, but his expression was sad. I knew his heart was broken. He had lost his father while he was still alive. But he needed to be strong for his sister, so I told him,

"You're our only man now. You have to study hard so you can come and join us. And remember to take care of your grandmother. She doesn't have anyone else. Her daughters are all in different countries, and your father will be busy with his new wife. Promise me you won't leave her until your father comes back to take care of her or for you to live with her."

"Live with her? And will his wife let him?"

"No one knows the future, my son. But your father won't be heartless to his mother. I hope so."

We took everything we needed, left the house, and went to an apartment I had bought near my son's university. I put it in Hesham's name so he would feel a sense of belonging. Three days later, my brother brought the divorce papers and said my ex-husband wanted a settlement and anything else he could get his hands on. I gave my brother the safe deposit box key and told him,

'He won't get anything until Hesham finishes university and takes care of all his expenses. Every month, he has to send Hesham money directly, or he can expect to go to jail. If he doesn't understand, tell him to remember our last drug deal. Then he'll know I'm not bluffing.'

My brother said, 'What kind of person have you become? Are you threatening the father of your children? All this because he chose to marry someone else and didn't want to upset God? You've crossed a line, sister. A man would never hurt his child.'

'Since when do you care about my children? Tell me, when was the last time you saw them? Do you know how my ex-husband treated our son all these years? And now you're telling me he wouldn't hurt him?'

My brother said, 'No father would hurt their child.'

'Really? Listen, just tell him what I said. Everyone is responsible for their own actions. Now, let's eat. You'll see my son whom you haven't seen in years.'

We got up from the cafe where we were sitting, and he thought I was taking him to my new home. He didn't know anything about my life with my husband over the years. Those years taught me how to think like him, how to exploit the ignorance of others. I'm not the naive girl I used to be who trusted everyone. She died the day my husband betrayed me and killed my faith in trust and honesty. I started driving my car, which I had bought two months ago when I sensed his betrayal, and I secretly got my license without his knowledge. He was too busy with other things. We drove to a restaurant and stopped in front of it. My brother exclaimed,

'Why are we stopping here? We're going to your house.'

'This restaurant belongs to my son. Didn't you read his name on the sign? He's inviting us for lunch.'

'When did he open this restaurant and how?'

'It's a gift from his grandmother. It belonged to her brother, and she inherited it. It's a secret between Hesham and his grandmother. I didn't know about it until yesterday. I just knew that Hesham was working here to keep up with his friends because his father wasn't giving him enough money.'

We got out of the car and went into the restaurant. We were greeted by a group of staff who directed us to the family section where Norsin was sitting. When she saw us, she got up and smiled at her uncle. After greeting us, she told me in a low voice that she would go and tell her brother in his office, then she left. I sat next to my brother and told him,

"I've changed my mind. You don't need to tell my ex-husband to deposit [amount] every month into Hesham's account. This is better, so he can finish his studies."

"Sister, for the sake of your children, especially your daughter, go back to your husband. Think about it. When she grows up and gets a husband, who will she live with, you or her father?"

"When that time comes, if she lives with me, he can ask for her, and I'll tell her father. But if she lives with her father, it's enough for him to just tell me where the wedding will be held. I don't care about formalities, dear uncle. My mother's happiness is most important to me."

The uncle asked, "And is your mother's happiness in being separated from your father?"

Hesham replied, "My father was the one who wanted this when he went after my cousin."

The uncle exclaimed, "What? Has Maggie gone mad? How could he think about his cousin's daughter?"

"Why are you surprised? He was the one who allowed her to get close. Don't worry about it. Now, let's finish our food and talk about other things. For example, how are your wife and children?"

The brother replied, "They're fine. Sana is pregnant again. I think I married a rabbit."

Hesham joked, "And did she get pregnant on her own, uncle? If you're a rabbit, then she is too. But children are a blessing."

The brother replied, "A blessing, but it's also extra work and stress."

"My dear, every child comes with a blessing. But if you're complaining, why didn't you consult a doctor to use birth control?"

The brother said, "We did, but she got pregnant anyway."

"Then don't be upset. Thank God for this new baby, despite your precautions."

The brother replied, "Alhamdulillah for everything."

We finished our meal, and time flew by as we talked and my brother tried to convince me to change my mind about the divorce and go back to my ex-husband or at least give him the papers I was threatening him with. But it was no use. I had made up my mind to get a divorce and travel, and I wouldn't go back.

Two days passed after my meeting with my brother, but he kept calling twice a day to try to persuade me to change my decision to travel and stay with my children in Egypt. He said that continuing my higher studies wasn't important or necessary. He even offered me a job at my ex-husband's private hospital. I replied, "He's so generous, I can't believe what you're saying. Are you really trying to convince me to work for my ex-husband? How can you think like that, brother?"

On the third day, Hesham returned, leaving his sister with our grandmother. He told me that she was very sick and that our father had gotten married and traveled before she fell ill. She was now alone with no one to care for her, so Norsin had stayed there. I couldn't wait. I grabbed a small suitcase, packed some clothes, and put it in front of my son. I said,

"What are you waiting for? Take me to her. You drive; I'm too nervous."

"I love you, Mom."

"Come on, we don't have time."

We went to our grandmother's house. She was lying on her bed, semi-conscious and unaware of her surroundings. She kept mumbling, "Why... my son... why did you do this... how could you lose your children... how did I make such a mistake in raising you and made you such a selfish man?"

"Hesham, call the family doctor quickly. Grandmother's temperature is high."

"Yes, Mom."

Hesham rushed to the phone, and after half an hour, the doctor arrived. I had already lowered her body temperature with cold compresses. After examining her, the doctor said,

"Her sugar levels are high, and her mental state is poor. She also has a severe cold. Although she should be taken to the hospital, I can't recommend it because moving her at her age is very risky. So, I'll bring an oxygen machine and prescribe some medication. You should measure her sugar levels morning and evening. Let's pray for her recovery."

The doctor left after bringing a nurse to stay with her and monitor her condition. I sat with her in the same room, having prepared a couch to sleep on beside her. The nurse slept in the next room and came in every so often to check on her, measure her temperature, and check the oxygen machine, then go back to her room. In the morning, I woke up to the sound of my mother-in-law calling me. I approached her until she could touch my face with her weak hand and whispered wearily,

"I loved you from the first day you married my son. I chose you for him. Forgive me for teasing you about marrying someone else. I was just joking. I knew he would never find someone like you, even if he searched the whole world. Tell him I'm not angry with him, but I'm sad for him. I know you won't forgive him, and that's your right. But forgive me for my mistake in raising him. I'm the one who made him selfish by spoiling him and giving him everything he wanted, even at the expense of his sisters. But I tried to fix that and left a will with my lawyer. You're the one who will oversee its execution."

May God grant you a long life," she said. "Listen, there's no time. My husband is calling me. Promise me you'll travel and fulfill your dreams. Don't look back at him. He has the wife he chose, and if he leaves her, she'll leave him. My heart tells me you shouldn't go back to him. He doesn't deserve you."

I couldn't reply. She had passed away after saying the Shahada. I closed her eyes and kissed her forehead. Then I got up from the floor, where I had been kneeling close to her, and tried to wipe away my tears so I could be strong in front of my children who were crying behind me. Before I could speak, we heard the front door open forcefully, followed by my ex-husband's shouting voice:

"I told you there must be a medical reason for this. I'm going to see a specialist to find out the reason. I swear, if my suspicions are correct, I'll kill her with my own hands!"

I couldn't control myself. I rushed towards him and slapped him hard, screaming, "How could you leave your mother alone when you knew she was diabetic and had heart problems? Why didn't you call one of your sisters before you left so one of them could stay with her? What kind of ingratitude is this? If you didn't attend her funeral, at least attend the burial and remember to meet with our family lawyer."

He was stunned and speechless. He rushed into his mother's room. I heard his sobs as I left with Hesham. I told him to go back with his father and stay until the three days of mourning were over.

Three weeks passed before I met him again at the family lawyer's office. For the first time, his sisters gathered in one place. Each of them pretended to love him, but I could see the hypocrisy in this family. I had never seen it before, or maybe I had just chosen to ignore it. Why? Because I had my share of hypocrisy from my own siblings. What has happened to families? Where are the family bonds that I used to see between my mother and her sisters or my father and his sisters? Where is the family gathering in times of trouble, before the joy? I imagine if my son and daughter hadn't been with their grandmother that day, would she have died alone without anyone noticing? How can they smile and talk lovingly about her when they haven't seen her for months, especially her own son who left her and traveled with his new bride? And where is she, by the way? Why didn't she come with him? I wonder if their intimate relationship is healthy. Has something happened to him because of the medication I used to give him? But his face is broken, and he has lost confidence in himself. I'm sure of it. I'll wait, and time will expose what he's trying to hide. We sat for a few minutes waiting for the lawyer to open the will.

Lawyer Marzouk sat flipping through some papers, waiting for us to gather. Once he was sure everyone was present, he opened the safe next to him and took out an envelope sealed with red wax. Then he said,

"What is in this envelope was written more than three months ago when Mrs. Fatima Mohammed Ali was in good health and had full mental capacity. She wrote this will in her own handwriting after completing a medical examination and tests that proved she was in good health and had a sound mind. Now I will open the envelope, but I want to warn you that any objection to the will is unacceptable. Mrs. Salma Abdel Kader will ensure that it is executed as written in the documents, and as I said, it is in the handwriting of Mrs. Fatima."

Lawyer Marzouk cut the tip of the envelope and took out three papers. Then he began to read what was written on them in front of everyone.

chapter 6

After finishing the first page, the lawyer said, "This is the will. The remaining papers are the sales contracts that Mrs. Fatima mentioned in her documents."

"She's senile! She has no right to give any money to Salma. I will contest the validity of this will and these documents. I will even challenge my mother's mental state at the time she wrote this nonsense!"

He stormed out of the office without listening to anyone else. His sister Najla followed him, saying, "You've gone mad, Munir! Didn't you hear the lawyer say that our mother wrote these documents after a medical examination that proved she was both mentally and physically sound?"

Manar replied, "I don't know why you hate Salma so much. She has done everything to please you. She has done things that I would never have done. But I tell you one thing, he deserves more than what your mother did."

"I did everything out of love to make my brother happy, but I discovered that he never loved me. But as my mother said, I must fix what I've ruined in my life myself."

I got up and said goodbye to everyone. I told the lawyer to start all the necessary procedures to execute the will and asked him to hurry up before I left.

Then I went out to my car and found my ex-husband standing next to it, with anger etched on his face. As soon as he saw me, he said,

"Do you think that after what you've done, I'll come crawling back to you and leave the woman I love to be your servant?"

"I haven't done anything. I don't want you in my life now or ever."

"That's why you gave me those drugs for the entire month before you filed for divorce."

"What drugs are you talking about? I don't understand."

"Really? Do you know something? I thought about taking you back and leaving you neither a wife nor a divorcee. I was going to file a complaint because I didn't agree to your travel."

"You can't stop me from traveling, even if you were my husband. As for coming back to you, do it and I swear I'll imprison you and divorce you for harm, and you won't be able to get me back then."

"Do whatever you want, because I've taken you back, and I'm going to file a lawsuit to force you to obey me."

He turned and got into his car, speeding away. I went back to the lawyer's office, and his sisters were still there. I said angrily,

"I want you to come with me to the police station now. I'm going to file a report against my ex-husband for organ trafficking."

Manar said, "Have you gone crazy? Do you want to accuse your brother of this? He could never do that."

"Yes, he did, and I have proof. Go to your brother and tell him to prepare himself for prison. We'll see what his new bride will do then."

The lawyer said, "I'll send another lawyer with you, but I can't go with you because I'm the family lawyer and I have official powers of attorney."

Then he picked up the phone, called someone, and after a few moments, he told me, "Lawyer... will meet you in half an hour at... police station. Here's his number."

Najla said, "Why are you helping her? My brother is innocent of what she's accusing him of."

The lawyer said, "That's up to the courts to decide. If he's innocent, he has to prove it. And for your information, I won't be defending him. I'm now preparing his opponent's case if he files a lawsuit against the sanity of Mrs. Fatima."

I left them talking to the lawyer and headed home to gather the documents and recordings of the confessions of some hospital doctors and the accusations of patients whom he had tried to bribe in the past to ensure they wouldn't file complaints against the hospital. Then I went to the police station, met with the lawyer, and filed a lawsuit with complaints signed by many patients.

After more than five hours, I returned home to find my son waiting for me, holding papers that a bailiff had brought. It was a court order forcing me to reside in a designated house, based on the obedience case. The address was written on the paper, along with a warning that if I didn't comply, I would be arrested and forcibly taken.

Hesham exclaimed, "How could he do that? How does he have the right?"

I replied, "Don't worry, I'll go to this address, but you have to take care of your sister for a while and come to see me every day to make sure I have everything I need. I promise I'll end this as soon as possible."

Hesham asked, "Why is he doing this? I'll talk to him."

"No, Hesham, don't. Your father can no longer distinguish between right and wrong. Don't worry, I can get my rights back from him, and I will. But I was trying to avoid confronting him in court, but he forced me to do this. Take a picture of this paper and give it to the lawyer. Tell him this is your father's new residence, and he should register it."

I left my son and daughter at home and went to the address on the papers. It was a small apartment in a working-class neighborhood, consisting of one room and a living room in a dilapidated building. It only had a bed, a wardrobe, and a three-burner stove. My ex-husband, or rather, my current husband according to the papers, was waiting for me at the entrance. As soon as I entered, he closed the door and said,

"If I've become disabled for a while, I'll get treatment. But what I'm going to do to you here will disable you for life without any cure."

I replied, "Go ahead and do whatever you want. You don't have much time left."

He approached her, his face contorted with rage and malice. He started to roll up his sleeves as she backed away, her eyes fixed on him, knowing full well that she would let him harm her. She wouldn't even defend herself, wanting him to fall into the trap she had carefully set for him on her way to this house. She began to look around for anything she could use against him at the right moment, until her eyes fell on an earthenware jug (a qulla) used for drinking water. She smiled defiantly and repeated her words,

"Do whatever you want. You don't have much time left."

He raised his hand as high as he could and began to slap her, then grabbed her by the hair, trying to pull off her headscarf with one hand while repeatedly slapping her with the other. She didn't scream but endured the pain and offered some minor resistance, making feeble attempts to push him away or escape, but he didn't give her a chance and slapped her even harder until she fell to the ground. He began kicking her as she tried to protect her body as much as possible to avoid broken ribs.

He stopped, panting as if he had been running or exercising, then leaned down and grabbed what was left of her headscarf, pulling her hair with it. That's when she let out a loud scream. She pulled herself up with him and with all her strength, she kicked him in the shin with her heel. Then, with the hand closest to him, she hit his hand, forcing it away from her hair. With the same hand, now clenched into a fist, she punched him hard in the solar plexus (the upper part of the abdomen between the rib cage and the hip bone), causing him to release her hair and double over in pain. But she didn't wait long. She reached out, grabbed the earthenware jug, and struck him hard on the side of his head as he was bent over. He fell into a brief or temporary faint. She continued to scream as if he were still hitting her, then stopped and whispered, "I forgot to tell you that I've been training in self-defense for a while now because I expected what you were going to do." She then went to the door and started banging on it loudly, screaming.

"Help me! He's going to kill me!"

She then turned around and began to throw the chairs to the ground with force, shattering them, and screaming. She pushed the table over, threw the cushions off the couch, and went to the iron-barred window, banging her head against it to make it appear to those gathering below that he was still hitting her. Because the area was a working-class neighborhood, the neighbors quickly gathered and tried to break down the door. Before they succeeded, she sat down holding the broken pieces of the earthenware jug near his head, pulling her knees up to her chest and crying. When the neighbors entered, the women approached her and comforted her. While they were trying to break down the door, the neighbors had called the police, who arrived after the neighbors had entered the apartment. He was starting to come to and found himself surrounded by the police and a crowd of neighbors.

“What’s happening? Why are you all here? Get my wife out of here and teach her a lesson.”

The officer replied, “Alright, so you admit to assaulting her.”

“I made a mistake, and I want to correct her. It’s my right as a husband.”

The officer said, “Take him to the police station and take her to the hospital. I want a medical report of her condition. And will you be pressing charges against him for harm and assault?”

“Yes, I will file a complaint.”

So, I went with some of the neighbors and a police officer to the nearest hospital. The doctor wrote a medical report detailing all the visible marks on my body. Then we took the report and went to the police station. The women returned to their homes. Upon arriving at the police station, the police officer sent a military officer to bring my husband from the holding cell to witness the filing of the complaint against him. The officer documented what he had seen at the apartment in the report, as well as my husband’s confessions there. Then he asked my husband again...

“Why did you assault your wife?”

“I wanted to punish her. I found her with another man, but he managed to escape when I arrived at the apartment.”

Before the officer could speak, I shouted, “And how did he escape when there’s only one entrance, the apartment is on the first floor, all the windows are barred, and the door was locked from the inside, and you were the one who locked it? Can’t you come up with a better lie?”

“You put drugs in my food to make me impotent because I wanted to marry another woman.”

“I didn’t do that. Besides, we ate from the same food. Why did you get sick and I didn’t? Don’t you want to tell the officer the truth? Because I’m going to tell him the whole story.”

Then I turned to the officer, who had been listening to both of us calmly.

"Five months ago, he told me he wanted to marry another woman. I didn't object, I just asked for a month, then he would divorce me and I would go abroad and leave him the children. He agreed to this.

Then, as time passed, he found out that I had applied to complete my graduate studies in Turkey and that I had been accepted by a university there. So he withdrew his daughter's papers and enrolled her in a government school in the same country where I would be living. He said he couldn't take care of the girl because he would be busy with his new wife. I didn't object, but I asked him to hurry up with the divorce. I left the house I was living in after selling it because it belonged to me, and I moved with my son and daughter to another place. He sent me the divorce papers. A few days after the divorce, he got married and went on a honeymoon, leaving his sick mother alone and not caring about her. I couldn't leave her like that after I learned from my son that her illness had worsened and that there was no one to take care of her. So I went and brought my husband's family doctor and spent the last day of her life with her. You can verify this by asking the doctor and the nurse who I left with her to care for her mother. But after she died, I was surprised when his family lawyer called me and told me that I had to be present when the will that Fatima had left was opened. There, I discovered that his mother had left me some of her property and had bequeathed a third of her estate to me on the condition that I fulfill her wishes. You can also verify this with the lawyer. This angered my ex-husband and he said he would file a lawsuit claiming that my mother-in-law was mentally incompetent when she wrote the will, and the lawyer also testified to this. When I left the lawyer's office, my ex-husband was standing downstairs and threatened me in front of the building's doorman. You can ask the doorman. After that, on my way home, I met one of the patients who had undergone surgery at my ex-husband's hospital. He gave me some papers and videos showing that my ex-husband and a group of doctors at the hospital were stealing organs during surgeries. When he and some other patients tried to report them, they were bribed or threatened, so the other patients backed down, but his wife died because of my ex-husband. So he thought of taking revenge on him and killing me, but when he watched me for a while, he learned that I had divorced him, so he changed his mind and decided to tell me everything on the condition that I help him get to my ex-husband to take revenge on him. But I was able to convince him to report him to the authorities instead of taking revenge, and I agreed to help him by hiring a good lawyer and paying all the necessary expenses for the lawyer. I've given you the number of the report the man filed and the lawyer's phone number."

The officer: "We have verified the complaint filed against [S.A.] by one of the individuals who accuses the hospital of causing his wife's death and stealing her organs, with the assistance of Dr. [M.A.], a world-renowned doctor who established a private hospital two years ago. Others have filed other lawsuits against the hospital. We will summon some neighbors to verify the wife's statements and he will be detained for three days, with the possibility of renewal."

[S.A.] was escorted out of the office by one of the officers, essentially dragged to the detention cell. His eyes looked at me in astonishment as he muttered, almost audibly, "How did she do it? This is the stupid girl I married. I can't believe this. How I used to mock her stupidity and blind obedience without thinking or even objecting to anything I asked or ordered her to do. How she prepared for my deception and foiled it."

He disappeared from my sight outside the office. I closed my eyes sadly and then excused myself to leave. After signing the papers, I left the police station and got into a taxi, returning to my house. My bag and phone weren't with me, as I had left them in that apartment when they took me to the hospital. So I rang the doorbell, and as soon as my son opened the door, I threw my head on his shoulder and cried like I had never cried before. My son tried to ask me what had happened, and my daughter came close, hugging me and wiping my back with her hand. Then they took me to my room. I spoke in a low voice,

"I don't want to talk about anything now, please."

I went into my room and stretched out on the bed, pulling the covers over me without changing my clothes or even taking off my headscarf. I know deep down that the decision to file a report of assault was a wrong decision in the eyes of many in my family or society, but it was my right. If I had given it up, how could I teach my daughter not to give up her rights under pressure from customs and society? How could I teach my son that women have rights and that he should think about them and even encourage his sister or future wife to claim her rights? Yes, I made a mistake in the past by giving up many of my rights for the sake of love or fear of society's judgment, and because society expects blind obedience to the husband, even at the expense of one's legitimate rights. Yes, I didn't want to face him in court so that his image would remain good in front of our children, at least until the divorce. But every time I tried to improve his image, he did wrong to me and to himself. So what I did was not wrong. I am the victim, not the perpetrator. Or am I partly to blame for my concessions throughout our married life? Or is it true, as my brother says, that I am selfish and didn't think about my children? Should I have continued my married life to raise the children with a father and mother? My mind is aching from thinking so much. Did I make a mistake by asking for a divorce and leaving, and then filing this report? Yes, this report is the reason why, if I hadn't been cautious and talked to the shopkeeper downstairs, he could have proven this dirty accusation against me. If I had defended myself from the beginning and hadn't let him hit me for a while, I wouldn't have been able to prove the assault or prove that I was defending myself, which is why I hit him in the head with the earthenware jug. But I never imagined he would accuse me of dishonor and not consider that I am the mother of his children. Didn't he think about how his children would face society after this accusation and the rumors that would follow? Damn it, I knew he was selfish and ungrateful, but I also didn't think he would lack the courage and fear for his children's reputation. How can I teach my children to respect their father after this? How can I raise them to be good people after this? What should I do? Should I wait for the divorce and force my son to withdraw his papers from his university and submit them to a university in Turkey, and make him sacrifice more than a year and start over again, far from the noise of the scandal that his father created? Wait, should I waste my son's study years because of his father's reckless actions? Isn't it enough that the girl wasted a whole year because he withdrew her papers and submitted them to a Turkish school?

At this thought, I jumped up in fright, screaming,

"Damn that Turkish school! It starts in two months, and I won't be able to travel in that time because I've been returned to my husband's custody. And if I ask for a divorce from him now, he won't agree, and if I file a lawsuit for harm, it will take a lot of time, and my daughter will lose another year. Damn you, man, you've ruined my daughter's life!"

My voice was so loud that my son and daughter rushed in, terrified and worried.

Hishham: "What's happening? What's wrong with you?"

Noursein: "Are you okay, Mom?"

I couldn't control my voice, or my emotions, or any logical thinking. I screamed,

"Your sister is going to lose two years of her studies!"

Hishham: "Let's ask a lawyer about the possibility of you traveling, or I'll talk to Dad and..."

"No, you won't talk to your father. I'll call the lawyer I know and ask him what to do."

I got up quickly, took my son's phone, and called the new lawyer I was dealing with. After a few seconds, he answered, and the conversation went as follows:

"Assalamu Alaikum, I'm Salma."

"Wa Alaikum Assalam, of course I know you. I took your son's number when I came to your house this morning and didn't find you."

"You came here? You didn't tell me. Maybe because I was exhausted."

"Yes, I came to confirm some information and necessary papers for the case, but your son told me about the case of marital obedience that your ex-husband filed after taking you back."

"Well, since you know that, I wanted to ask you something. Is it possible for me to travel, especially after this issue of marital obedience?"

"Alright, listen. Your husband has used the right of retention here (a legal right enforced by the courts) which states that a wife cannot travel without his permission. However, the wife has the right to resort to the courts to prevent harm to her as a result of this arbitrary decision by the husband, which harms her work or academic path. This is because the judge is the guardian of the one who has no guardian, and she can obtain permission to travel from the judge."

"How long will it take to file such a case?"

"You can file a divorce case on the grounds of harm, and this will automatically revoke his right to prevent you from traveling, especially after the assault report you filed."

"How long will this take?"

"From three to five months if we go to the urgent court due to your urgent need to travel for the start of your work in Turkey."

"But this will harm my daughter's studies. I haven't arranged accommodation for my daughter there yet."

After a short silence, the lawyer replied, "Let me go to your husband and negotiate with him to give your daughter permission to travel with the possibility of her traveling with her brother. There, I can contact a friend of mine to find housing near her school, and he is a good friend who will take care of her and her brother until you travel to them. He can also request a deferral for you at the university due to your inability to travel from Egypt for a year. After your daughter and son travel with her, we can file a divorce case on the grounds of harm."

"But he might be stubborn and refuse to let the girl travel."

"Leave this to me. I'll negotiate with him."

"Okay, I'll wait for your call."

"Insha'allah (God willing)."

Three days passed since this call, and my brother and my husband's brothers were calling me all these days to make me drop the cases I had filed against my husband. My brother insists that what I'm doing is inappropriate and will harm my children, and that it's shameful for me and my reputation. And how will the children look in front of their friends and society when the mother sends their father to prison? As for my husband's brothers, all they care about is their spoiled brother and how he is suffering in detention while he is innocent of what I accused him of.

Yes, I know he didn't participate with the doctors who stole patients' organs without their knowledge, but when he colluded with them to cover up the matter and tried to bribe the families of the patients to prevent them from filing a complaint out of concern for protecting the hospital's reputation, and then he pushed the doctors to resign and leave the hospital, I had no choice but to use this case against him because he was the one who started the hostility against me."

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